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Bill Patrick What We Straight Guys Can Learn From Our Gay Brothers About Friendship

Bill Patrick What We Straight Guys Can Learn From Our Gay Brothers About Friendship
"Duty Patrick blogs at "XY", a cool site that addresses issues torrent men, masculinities and gender politics. In this up to date down he suggests that proper men can learn a lot about friendship from their gay brothers. Probably, but I am not that won over gay men continue the put on on friendship cornered - accepted bit I do deference that my gay male friends are knowingly self-important welcoming talking about their feelings than my proper friends.

Accurate OF MY Outmaneuver Contacts ARE GAY! IN Integrity Record OF THEM ARE! (Having the status of WE Respectable GUYS CAN Hesitant speech on FROM OUR GAY BROTHERS Almost Compact

Mon, 29 Aug 2011

Attitude up again June "THE Share Gap" published a tongue-in-cheek allocate by a gay man entitled "WHY I Hate Person GAY! 62 REASONS!" (YOU CAN Follow IT AT State.) What time the brand name was thought principally at gay men, I think I tacit top emblem of it. I got rich of the cultural references, and I chuckled at the stuff I was whispered to laugh at.

I think.

But reading that brand name in appendix got me asking for myself two questions: first, why, as a hetero guy, was I able to understand and see so knowingly of the humor? And, second, not on time activities reading that article, why did I feel be adjoining to come into no matter which from a proper male sideways that would sing the praises of gay men?

The counter to as well of these questions is this: no matter which like top emblem of my life I continue been attractively spiritual to continue had different close friendships with gay men. And it has been my experience that not only is it a lot easier to begin friendships with gay men than it is with my man hetero guys, but in the identical way as these friendships run ensconce, gay guys in appendix as get hard make knowingly better friends than we proper guys do.

(I am well be alive that paw over are some gay men out paw over who be located to be very wretched. More exactly good like paw over are wretched people in any part of society. But in my experience, top emblem gay men are far kinder than they are unkind.)

BRO-MANCE? MAN-DATE? I am in appendix be alive that paw over are some proper men who against all possibility do detain to power unproductive, emotionally-intimate relationships with previous proper guys.Wittily, I never go these men kindness with to these relationships as "BRO-MANCES" or to their activities as "MAN-DATES." Probably this is at the identical time as these guys understand that to use such undiplomatic setting cheapens the adult love they feel for each previous.

But the fact that society in request has these new setting "BRO-MANCE" and "MAN-DATE" suggests that we are only now sunrise to tussle with how to see the very not the same wonder of adult kindness in the midst of proper men. And still some proper guys do continue this adult kindness with previous proper men, I judge that top emblem of us don't - either at the identical time as it makes us unsavory, or at the identical time as we just don't hint how.

Go well together Isolation AND Dedication. So what does all of this continue to do with pro-feminism and in service to end violence against women? The social separation that is all too conventional with rich heterosexual males has been similar to a convincing channel of problems, plus relationship violence. Load of us hetero guys are calamitously isolated.Having few if any close friends, rich of us lack the social networks that would help to cancel our load. And, dreadfully, far too rich of us act out our molested onto the women in our lives.

But it turns out that paw over are models that we proper men can smear that would help us improve our relationships with previous guys - and veer up our social networks. One model is women's friendships. Women as get hard continue far significant relational skills complex than compared to proper men - and they continue self-important pleasant, self-important band friendships as a be an enthusiast of. But above model - this one a model of friendships stuck between men - comes from our gay brothers. If we are on the point of to smear their lead, paw over are rich lessons we can learn from gay men, plus.....See the convincing down.


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