How To Find Your Meaning And Purpose In Life

"All of us have something that gives us a sense of identity", "meaning", or "purpose". Take that thing away, and we are bound to experience all sorts of psychological disturbances the most brutal, perhaps, is an existential crisis. In other words, you have a certain need; something that you must attach or connect yourself to so that you don't lose your grip on reality. So how can we exactly determine what it is that we need?Your need is different from other people's needs because we all operate in varying degrees of self-awareness. Some people focus on higher attainments while others find their fulfillment in simple ones. Those who question the nature of reality, for example, are trying to fulfill their spiritual needs, while those who are looking for the right partner - who will give "meaning" to their existence - may be trying to fulfill their sexual or emotional needs. Different strokes for different folks."Man is born as a freak of nature, being within nature and yet transcending it. He has to find principles of action and decision-making which replace the principles of instincts. He has to have a frame of orientation which permits him to organize a consistent picture of the world as a condition for consistent actions. He has to fight not only against the dangers of dying, starving, and being hurt, but also against another danger which is specifically human: that of becoming insane. In other words, he has to protect himself not only against the danger of losing his life but also against the danger of losing his mind."Eric Fromm, The Revolution of Hope: Toward a Humanized Technology (1968), p. 61Take a look at the seven needs below (starting from the lowest to the highest) to determine what you are trying to fulfill or the kind connection you have lost if you are suffering from an existential crisis. Take note that some of these needs may overlap each other as in the case of a person who is trying to gain authority and group acceptance (social need) in order to fulfill his/her intellectual pursuits (intellectual need). In another sense, the needs may take each other's form as in the case of a person who is consciously trying to make a name in the music industry (creative need) with the unconscious desire for popularity (social need). It's up to you to determine which type of need corresponds to your present state of mind. 1. SURVIVAL - the need for safety, financial security, material resources, health, etc. are examples of survival needs. Whatever pertains to human biological survival generally belongs to this category. For example, some people find fulfillment in providing for themselves and their families. Suffering a financial hardship is not an option for them. As long as they can find pleasure in something and avoid suffering (pain), life remains meaningful and purposeful. 2. SEXUAL - the need for sexual pleasure, reproduction, nurture of the young, etc. are some examples of sexual needs. Whatever pertains to human sexuality generally belongs to this category. For example, some men find their sense of identity and purpose by pursuing as many women as they can while some women find fulfillment in bearing children. They don't really care too much about politics, proving the existence of God and aliens, getting rich, and whatnot. 3. SOCIAL - the need for status, authority, power, group acceptance, self-esteem, achievement, etc. are some examples of social needs. Whatever pertains to your position in society generally belongs to this category. Some people, for example, would do anything to achieve fame or social recognition while others just do their best to be part of the group in which they belong. Those who fall under this category get their sense of "identity", "meaning", and "purpose" mainly from the society. 4. EMOTIONAL - the need for love, relatedness, friendship, intimacy, etc. are some examples of emotional needs. Whatever pertains to interpersonal relationship generally belongs to this category. Emotional needs may arise when you want to overcome the feeling of separateness without sacrificing your sense of individuality. In other words, you need to be with someone other than yourself. Those who fall under this category get their sense of "identity", "meaning", and "purpose" from their emotional attachment with other people. People who do not succeed in fulfilling this need tend to become narcissists. 5. CREATIVE - the need to express artistic talent, musical skills, business expertise, dance, athletics, architecture, etc. are some examples of creative needs. Basically, anything that compels you to express yourself creatively belongs to this category. Some people, for example, have a sense of purpose as long as they can sing in front of an audience or if they can, perhaps, make their living out of that which they love doing the most. 6. INTELLECTUAL - the need for problem solving, analysis, research, exploration, investigation, etc. are some examples of intellectual needs. Anything that compels you to use your rational brain to its fullest capacity belongs to this category. Some people, for example, get their sense of "meaning" as long as they can rationalize something. They become scientists, philosophers, psychologists, mathematicians, engineers, and so on. Those who have reached their limit in using the rational brain may either move to the next level (spiritual) or become raging lunatics. 7. SPIRITUAL - the need to contemplate or question things beyond the reach of rational explanation. Anything that compels you to explore the mystical, spiritual, divine, metaphysical, transcendent, or whatever you want to call it falls under this category. For example, there are those who want to know if there is a soul that survives after they die, if there's really a "meaning" to existence, if there is life somewhere else in the universe, if there are other realms of existence, if the Flying Spaghetti Monster really exists, and so on. Those who have reached the end of their spiritual journey may either become enlightened beings or hopeless psychopaths. Keep in mind that all these needs are present within each and every one of us. You should not focus solely on just one need and neglect all the rest, but it also doesn't mean that you should exert an equal amount of energy in taking care of all these needs all the time. Just remember that before you take a step to reach something that's high, you should have a stable foundation so you don't fall down. Manage your lower needs first as best you can so they won't give you any trouble in the future.If you take the time to reflect on these needs, you will discover that there is only one that really resonates with you. Don't think it; feel it. Your heart, not your brain, is the one that is keeping you alive, so it should know what it is you are looking for. When you are searching for a purpose you are quite ineffectual, but when you find the right one you respond with increased energy. Finding a purpose in life is a sign that you have reached some level of completion. But if you don't find what you're looking for, don't worry. It will find you. Peace and respect! R